


A Penny For Your Laugh

by dipstick



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Under the Red Hood
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Child Abuse, F/F, F/M, Gen, Joker is an abusive fuck who deserves to die, Villains, more tags to come probably
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2016-11-19
Packaged: 2018-08-31 22:41:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8596585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dipstick/pseuds/dipstick
Summary: What would happen if the one to find Jason Todd stealing tires was not Batman, but the king clown himself.





	

It was cold and dark. Water dripped from the sky. Not enough to soak him through, but enough that his hands were numb where they gripped the tire iron.

"Fuck", Jason swore as it slipped through his fingers again. Clanging against the ground, it was the only sound besides rain in the alley. Three tires off the behemoth of a vehicle and the last wouldn't budge, too slick with rain to get a firm grip.

He could leave it, but that last tire. It was food for another week. Fuck if he was careful, it could be food for two, maybe three.

"What am I even doing?" He murmured as he picked up the iron again. 

"What **are** you doing, kid?" A voice asked from behind him.

"Shit," Jason swore, turning quickly and brandishing the metal in his hand like a blade.

He expected to see a large looming shadow. He expected to see the Bat. Which honestly he knew wouldn't be a bad deal. Everyone knew Batman didn't hurt kids.

But it wasn't the Bat.

"I asked what you're doing, kid, playing a joke?" The man asked. He was in a suit. A nice suit for all that it was soaked through. His smile looked like it was melting. White mixed with red dripping down his face.

"N-no, sir," Jason squeaked out. Surprised he could even do that. His hand shook in front of him. Still gripping the tire iron. Even knowing it would do no good.

Everyone knew the Joker hurt kids.

"Hmm, but I like jokes," he said with a breathless laugh. Leaning down to the three tires lined up on the curb. "Especially against Batsy."

Jason remained silent. Hoping the one thing he had feared all night. That the Dark Night would return.

"It's a pretty good joke too." He continued, stroking the tires lovingly. "I could use a mind like yours."

"Me?" Jason questioned. Stall his brain screamed. Stall for time.

"Of course," the clown replied, standing abruptly. His smile stretching impossibly wide as he exclaimed "It would be wonderful, my very own boy blunder!"

"Boy blunder?" Jason asked. His eyes darting to the mouth of the alley.

"Don't play dumb, kid, I don't have use for dumb." Joker growled. Taking a jarring step forward.

Jason flinched back. _Think_ he thought, _he will kill me. He won't even flinch as he cuts me throat_. "Ah, robin right? You want me to be your robin?"

"Exactly!" He snapped his fingers. "But instead of saving the borings, **you** will help me crack them open! We'll drill holes into them, slowly with a screwdriver!" He giggled."Until they are Swiss cheese dripping in cranberry sauce!!" He cackled. His whole body contorting with his high pitched screech of laughter.

Jason shook harder. _This man is inhuman_ he thought. _For all he paraded in a human skin he couldn't be real._

"Isn't it funny?" The Joker asked laughter stopping abruptly. His smile turned sharp as a thumb tac. "You should laugh when it's funny, kid."

Jason laughed. A strangled breath of a thing. Right on queue. Because fuck if he was going to die in that alley. Not there, not where the world expected him to.

"Oh, you can do better than that." The comic rasped. He strode towards Jason his left hand holding something plasticine.

"Please, don't," Jason whispered brandishing the tire iron higher. He was prepared to swing. He knew it would give him far less mercy, but if he could fend the freak off. For possibly even a couple minutes longer. For just long enough. Batman might return. He might make it.

"Tsk, tsk, bad boy" the Joker graveled. His right hand came up impossibly fast. It grasped the end of Jason's makeshift club with a grip that seemed as strong as the iron itself. 

" _Little Bunny Foo-Foo_ ," He crooned. " _I don't wanna see you,_ _Scooping up the field mice,_ _and bopping them on the head_." And the clown raked the metal from his hand and swung it against his skull. 

 Jason's head was shattered glass. He saw the ground come up to kiss him and then there was nothing.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know how much time I'll get to work on this fic because I'm sort of prioritizing my trans Jay fic rn, but hopefully I can find some time to get some chps done ! This chp had been sitting finished in my drafts forever so I thought why not post it at the very least lol


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